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Thursday, September 9, 2010

Snuggie's Snugarena: ...

The giant backwards robe that is the Snuggie has been making me sick for the past year or so. If you're too lazy to stick your arms out of a blanket, then you really don't want that hot cocoa you're reaching for that badly, do you? If you really do want it, but your arm muscles can't be inconvenienced in the slightest, then grab your robe, put it on backwards, and walk around like a mental patient in his hospital paper apron, blissfully unaware that his buns are being buffeted by the breeze (that's consonance, people).

Search Google Images for "hospital robe" and this comes up.

The product itself isn't really that bad: I may be over-exaggerating the Snuggie's uselessness a little bit. What leaves a sour taste on my tongue is the horrendous ads. I believe they held a casting call, picked the worst actors, then asked a crowd to give them a location, improv show-style, then filmed it.

-"OK audience, need a place and defining characteristic!"
-"CULT MEMBERS AT A YOUTH SOCCER GAME!"

I am now near-thankful for the original ad ever since I saw the new one... just have a look.


Wow. Analysis:

1. 0:03 - "Let's legitimize our product as something other than a joke... and use the Macarena to do so." People are already making countless videos parodizing the Snuggie ads (check 'em out), can you imagine what the YouTube community will do now that they have the Macarena to feed on?

2. 0:04-0:27 - Fact: wearing a Snuggie amplifies the fun of every activity exponentially. This is true.

Trust me.

3. 0:10-0:11 - I have a sneaking suspicion she knows she's being filmed. She is part of the 4% of people aged 60+ who recognizes what a camera looks like and doesn't call every electronic device a Gameboy, iPod, or Walkman.

4. 0:11-0:13 - Typical depiction of typical girls at a typical sleepover, hula-hooping and singing into hairbrushes and such: happens all the time.

5. 0:13-0:15 - The only clever part of this commercial. Notice how the Snuggie cult members are warm and comfortable in their wizard cloaks, while the other fans are at the base camp nearest the summit of Mount Everest.

6. 0:18-0:19 - "Hey old leopard lady, look more awkward and uncomfortable." "I-I-I can't!" "Ah, OK... carry on then, shake those hips."

7. 0:20-0:22 - AAAHAHGGHGHHDSHGHFH IT'S A PUPPY!

8. 0:25-0:27 - Snuggie, perfect for looking at pornogr... oh, no, a centerfold of a woman who couldn't be more clothed if she was Middle Eastern, never mind.

9. 0:29-0:32 - ...and to wrap it up, they "raise the roof." They would have done the electric slide, the moonwalk, the YMCA, and Cotton Eyed Joe, but it's only a 30-second spot. They had a hard enough time with the roof raising anyway: the boy in blue up front is as rhythmic as Michael Jackson... right now (it's not too soon for "MJ's dead" jokes, I hope).

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